Knowledge of what should be happening - not an option in family law or medical decisions.

You have to start over.

The following steps are not negotiable.

1. Get all the Nolo Press books on family law - divorce, custody, support. Usually all are at your local library. If not, drive to the next big town if you don’t want to spend the money. Take money for copying important stuff.

2. Read all those books. Skimming is OK, but this isn’t Judge Judy. The rest of your life is on trial. This information’s gotta be in your head before you make decisions about anything else. Every thing that goes wrong will leave scars - just like a bad doctor.

3. Make a realistic (based on what you read) list of what has got to happen and what you’d like to have happen. Just the list. Two columns.

4. Starting down the lawyer road: Find a county in your state with fairly large cities (over 200,000) as close to you as possible. Every such county will have a bar association. Usually they have a non-profit attorney referral service that gives out three names of attorneys experienced in the stuff on your list. You get 30 minutes of phone call (not in person) with that attorney for about $30-$50. You read off the list to the attorney. They tell you how long the things take, the range of costs and likelihood that you will win. You stop right there. Period. This is your graduation day into an informed client.

4. Next step on the lawyer road: Plan what things you can get done with your budget. Start with the have to things first. Be conservative. Use the upper limit on costs and time. If you liked the lawyer you worked with, call back to see if they can take you as a client. If you didn’t like them, get the referral service to get you another name.

Knowledge is power. Really and truly in this arena. Too many people get the wrong attorney and stick with them through a lot of damage to their case. You did the right thing to move along.

But you might have to pay for an attorney to travel to you. Maybe not. Many courts allow for telephone appearances and fax filing. Small towns can provide like-minded attorneys for good or bad. Sounds like bad in this case. Get outta town for your lawyer.

Don’t lose sight of the possibility that you are a crazy person over some things. Everybody gets that way. Even you. Just cause things are getting worse doesn’t mean it’s not the best way to handle it.

In the judicial system, there often isn’t any option other than worse. Unless it’s worser. Here’s to your education. Best of luck with that. shadowsdreamisman

Most lawyers will work with each other to add unnecessary complexity and procedural steps to your case.

When there is no more money, and you stop telling him about all the “trivial” bullshit you want to deal with (in his mind anything under $100,000 is trivial) then your case will be completed and your divorce will be final. Art M

You didn’t say anything about your situation, so i’m not sure what else to say, unless you go out of town for another attorney?

Most attorneys these days give free consultations, so you could consider getting a couple of those. letterstoheather

Here you can find the best lawyer fast and free. gaye