Legal?
Hott Gymnast asked:
My friend was rape.d and her b/f and I have talked with her about turning the two guys in. She says that she won’t do anything b/c she gave up fighting back when she knew it was hopeless and in the eyes of the law, that makes it legal.
Is she right??
The second reason why not is b/c the two guys were old friends of hers. She tried to fight back but ended up with a broken wrist and broken ribs.
She doesn’t want her parents to know b/c she thinks they will blame her for not fighting back.
Would a parent feel this way??
This entry was posted
on Monday, July 5th, 2010 at 12:00 am and is filed under Parenting.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
My friend was rape.d and her b/f and I have talked with her about turning the two guys in. She says that she won’t do anything b/c she gave up fighting back when she knew it was hopeless and in the eyes of the law, that makes it legal.
Is she right??
The second reason why not is b/c the two guys were old friends of hers. She tried to fight back but ended up with a broken wrist and broken ribs.
She doesn’t want her parents to know b/c she thinks they will blame her for not fighting back.
Would a parent feel this way??

July 7th, 2010 at 8:39 pm
No. A true parent would be supportive and comforting to her. Me personally, I’d shoot the bastards. NuckinFutz
July 9th, 2010 at 9:09 pm
It’s not to late. Tell the police and your parents. If the law doesn’t do anything maybe the parents will. No means No oldokie1
July 12th, 2010 at 5:47 am
once she said no, its rape, regardless of how hard she fought
I would think her parents would support her, but not knowing them, dunno. the law says she was right, the longer she waits the harder it will be. head_banger_yyc
July 14th, 2010 at 1:56 pm
She needs to report this, even if she did give up fighting back, she still did NOT concent to it. I doubt her parents would blame her, if they know her they wouln’t blame her at all. jaamat6
July 15th, 2010 at 9:59 am
She should go to the police. Those guys will do it again to someone else if they’re not stopped. Ricky D
July 16th, 2010 at 11:49 pm
Just because she didn’t fight back doesn’t mean it wasn’t rape. She should go to the police. Those men had no right to do what they did. Even if they don’t get charged with rape, they should be charged with assult for breaking her wrist and ribs. Even if she doesn’t go to the police, please persuade her to call a rape hotline or talk to someone about this. I K L
July 18th, 2010 at 12:49 am
Her parents would have wanted her to fight back. She was right to fight, but you should be telling her parents! loulou
July 18th, 2010 at 1:24 pm
This should be posted under “dreams” or “fiction”. David W
July 19th, 2010 at 3:45 am
no matter what the situation, rape is a crime and should be pursued, she isnt a lawyer or a law enforcement official so she doesnt know what the outcome will be, her best idea is to report this and at least let the legal community know that these guys are doing this, maybe she will save it from happening to someone else, to do nothing though is a crime in itself. jelandjer
July 20th, 2010 at 9:17 pm
I don’t think it is legal to have sex with anyone who is fighting back. Just because she gave up fighting doesn’t make it legal. She probably did the right thing in giving up cause people who rape usually do it for the power trip. She should turn the guys in cause they might do it to someone else. As for her parents they should be understanding and not blame her if they really love her. sexythang
July 21st, 2010 at 11:54 pm
d. Snipers
July 25th, 2010 at 1:28 am
First of all there is no way in hell she is right! Just because someone takes advantage of you, and you don’t have enough strength to get away, doesn’t make in consentual. She needs to tell someone, It maybe her word against theirs unless she can prove it somehow, i do think she has a case however, because of the broken ribs and wrist. Please tell her to go to her parents and the authorities. Sounds to me like these two guys will do it again to someone else if they know they can get away with it. It doesn’t matter if she was friends with them, my sister was raped by her best friend that we grew up with! He got what he deserved so shall those 2. Please tell her to suck up her pride and tell someone, before it happens to another girl, it maybe to late for that as well, but if all these girls keep these secrets, they’ll get away with it forever, and it will be their fault as well for not saying anything, no one should or deserves to live with guilt like that! Jodie N
July 26th, 2010 at 1:36 pm
hello hott if she was legally raped it should be reported to the law for sure your friend just probably just quit trying because she was pretty lucky there but it dont make any difference if they here old friends that dont give them any reason to rape her they ought to take and cut there dicks right off this is advice from a male that loves you women and hates guys that take advantage of any female harold g
July 28th, 2010 at 4:46 pm
She does need to find the strength in herself to report this, and her parents will be there for her I am sure. No means no, and many rape survivors think that since they gave up fighting then it was somehow their fault. First get her to realize that she is a survivor, not a victim. She may have saved herself more injury or even death by not fighting them anymore. She needs to talk to and see a rape counselor and join in with other women that have been through the same thing. She does not have to talk unless she wants to, but she needs to know that she is, unfortunately not alone. These evil people need to pay for their crimes. Encourage her to speak out and turn this awful thing into something which she and other women like her can draw knowledge and strength. I sure hope that she seeks some help so that one day she will see herself as a survivor rather than a victim. jenn10274
July 31st, 2010 at 8:56 am
Shes probably scared and in so much emotional pain. I would urge your friend to tell her parents and seek counseling. Unless she got a rape exam afterwards it will be her word against theirs, it would be up the DA to seek charges, which they may or may not do. Right now though she really needs counseling to help her through this. It will tear her up if she keeps it a secret. Try to help her understand that just because she gave up fighting doesnt mean that she gave consent and under no means does that give someone the right to continue raping her. Try to help her understand that her parents are not going to blame her, and they can provide a great deal of support while she is going through this diffcult time. God bless her and you and her b/f for supporting her through this. TW
August 1st, 2010 at 6:15 pm
Just because she stopped fighting back does not mean that it is legal to rape her. The minute she says no and they force themselves on her it is considered rape, plain and simple. Of course turning them in at the time it happened would’ve been the best thing for her as the police would have had her checked out by a doctor & seman samples would’ve been taken.
You said she ended up with a broken wrist & ribs, did she go to the doctors regarding this? Did they not ask her any questions as to how she obtained these injuries? I would be really surprised to hear that the doctors didn’t ask how she got the injuries. I’m sure she probably had bruises as well from fighting in the beginning. Am I right? At least I’m assuming she obtained bruises as well as the other injuries.
As far as being a parent, and I am one, if she were my daughter I would not blame her for giving up on fighting back as sometimes you could end up worse than with a broken wrists & ribs, you could end up dead. You can only fight back for so long, and sometimes it is better to not continue fighting especially if your life depends on it. As a woman and a parent, I would insist that she still go to the police in regards to the rape. If she doesn’t do anything these 2 guys will be getting away with their crime and could possibly continue raping other women or come back to your friend and continue to torment & abuse her. Plus, it will just eat her up on the inside, as she will probably continue to think that it is her fault when it isn’t. And if her parents are any type of decent parents and human beings, they won’t blame your friend at all, they will be there to stand by her and support her. At least I would hope they would do that and much more!
Tell your friend that she needs to go to the police and turn these 2 jerks in immediately. Whether she tells her parents or not is up to her, though it would probably be for the best if she did. She will also need to get some sort of help, counseling as to what happened to her. There are organizations that deal with rape victims and they can help her out. If she does not know of any or if you don’t, then the police or her doctor can point her in the right direction. But she needs to take the first step which is turning them in.
I hope your friend will turn them in and get the help she will need to cope with this terrible ordeal. I’ll think good thoughts for your friend! Pastinky
August 5th, 2010 at 3:00 am
No means No. If it was forced sex and she did not consent then it is still rape. KitKat
August 6th, 2010 at 10:06 am
First off it is still illegal because in the eyes of the law if they say no or it is unwanted sex it is rap no matter what. Second she needs to tell her parents becuase unless they are unblanced they will not see her as not fighting back since she has a broken wrist and ribs. Third they have to be involved to help but she does need to do this becuase if she doesn’t she will regret it for life. Also most people that are raped are raped by people they know and trust. Toni T
August 9th, 2010 at 9:50 am
1. If she says no, even once, she was raped.
2. If she had injuries from fighting, they will be charged with rape and physical abuse.
3. She needs to go to the hospital (talk to them and they will send for the cops for a police report), and then to a therapist to deal with her feelings.
Lots of girls have been in that situation and she is lucky to have people like you and her boyfriend to support her : ) bpbjess
August 10th, 2010 at 11:11 pm
She needs to get to a hospital to have the rape kit - and they will get the police involved.
Only the hospital staff can help her - and she has definite medical needs in addition to psychological needs.
A WOMAN HAS A RIGHT TO SAY NO - AND IF THE MAN DOES ANYTHING AFTER THAT, THE MAN IS ABUSING HER, AND IS RESPONSIBLE FOR WHATEVER HE DOES AFTER THAT.
GOD bless us always.
MBA-Boston univ. May I help You?
August 13th, 2010 at 4:58 am
no way everyone who is raped feels its there fault unless she consented it was rape even if she consented at first then told them to stop if they didnt it was rape and if she ended up with broken wrists and ribs then those guys are going to prisen for more than rape but she needs to report it now and you need to make sure she does so these guys wont rape again! Nightchild
August 16th, 2010 at 4:29 am
No means no!!! Although, even though it IS NOT HER FAULT; she still feels guilty.
As far as the law: sometimes the LAW IS A JOKE!! Reporting the rape means going through the court (having HER entire life on trial) as well as having to go through a physical exam. I still don’t believe that it should be that way!!
As far as I’m concerned, they should just HANG THE MEN who do such things!! ilovepoison2820
August 18th, 2010 at 8:03 am
It doesn’t matter that she gave up fighting. She has bodily injuries that is sugnificant evidence. She of course should have had a rape kit done right away but. She needs to turn them in now. She needs to know that she is not the only girl in the world and how is she going to feel when it is her fault that they do it to someone else because she did not do her part. Shelly t
August 19th, 2010 at 1:01 pm
Put them away !! She had the right to say no and she apparently did. This will affect her in so many ways for the rest of her life if she doesn’t acknowledge it now. If it hasn’t been too long ago and she has proof of her injuries it will be easier. If not, she should still pursue it. She needs to tell her parents. I know…my daughter kept this from me for a couple of weeks before she got courage enough to speak up. These “worthless” men will continue to do this if they know they can keep getting away with it. Please make her do the right thing. Even though she’s afraid of the humiliation they may try and put her through she will survive it much better than if she lives with the “what if”. Good luck. chelko